You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Shame - the story of my life.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
Randomize
