mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
did i walk over a car last night?
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
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