no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize
