She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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