I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Randomize
