Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Randomize
