Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
