He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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