I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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