she looked like the before picture.
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
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