it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Randomize
