Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
my mouth tastes like poor choices
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
My ass is underappreciated
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