Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
