i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
well, you know. whores of a feather.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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