I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Randomize
