There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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