That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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