Well apparently he's into motor boating.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
