is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Randomize
