I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Can Purell be used as lube?
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
