found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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