Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
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