Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
its liver damage thursday
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize
