i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
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