North Korea, Best Korea!
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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