She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
