I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
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