Me. At least after what I've been through.
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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