drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Randomize
