Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize
