Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
