im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
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