HIV tests are more positive than that guy
is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
Randomize
