you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Randomize
