You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Randomize
