these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
i think my mom watched the whole time
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Randomize
