And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
