Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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