she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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