In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
How external is "for external use only"?
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
