Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
