Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize
