My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
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