I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
