Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Randomize
