dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
