There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
He had one of those small greek statue penises
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Randomize
