Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Randomize
