I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Randomize
