I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
